“My life is out of control”, you say?
“My life Sucks”, you say?
“I’ll start tomorrow”, you say?
For many of us, I am sure that we have heard or said these statements before?
Life can have a way of creeping up on us, and then seems to surprise us with scenarios that we can’t believe exist. Perhaps it is clutter and mess around the house, bills piled up on the counter, your work load that is at breaking point for you, or maybe excess body weight that came from nowhere, and a life that seems to be spiralling out of control for you.
The good news is that it is likely that the things that are causing you the most discomfort or stress did not arrive yesterday or last week.
It has likely built up gradually over time, so that it was not glaringly obvious that something was “not quite right”. Or maybe you chose to ignore the gradual building up of things and now you cannot ignore it any more.
What can you do?
Remember that everything is in your personal power to change and fix. Decide that it is time reclaim some sort of control that works for YOU. Don’t make any more excuses.
No one can make you do anything. Remember the time when perhaps your parents told you to do something, or a teacher gave you homework?
They could not make you do it… they could give out a consequence if you did not do something, but you ultimately held the key to completion.
You hold that key today.
When you decide that you have had enough of whatever is causing you distress or frustration, then (in most cases), you can also change the circumstances or surroundings to feel better.
Make a decision, and set aside a time to make the change.
Procrastination is one of the biggest blocks to getting things done for many people.
Putting off till tomorrow can feel good, but may not get you to where you need to be.
First things First.
How to overcome all the things that are frustrating you can be an awesome thought for most people.
Where to start?
Start at the beginning.
If you decide what needs your attention the most, then you can make a start on that area.
It may be your physical health, work stress, relationships, or your home environment.
Clutter has a way of making us feel exhausted. We can often feel lighter and freer if we can handle our space better too.
If clutter is a “biggie” for you, start at the beginning.
Begin with one room and then one drawer. Set a timer if you want to as well.
Say, 15 minutes. Then you can see results.
Decide whether you need an item, or if it has no more value to you.
Does it make you happy? Is it useful to you?
If not, then perhaps donate it, trash it if it is too damaged, but do it!
Recycle what you can. Take a break and come back either that day or set one day per week to de-clutter an area. You will notice the difference. You will feel the difference too.
Ask other people that live with you to respect your
de-cluttered area as well, so that mess does not reappear after all your hard work.
Is the clutter in your life emotional perhaps?
Is there perhaps a challenging relationship in your life that you are stuffing with food rather than talking about it? If you don’t feel able to talk with the person involved, then consider talking with a professional, such as a GP or psychologist. Getting relationship issues resolved can often bring you enormous relief, and it can also transform other seemingly unrelated areas in your life for the better, too.
Most of us have days which are bright and sunny, and others which seem dreary and more difficult.
As long as the dreary days are limited and you know that they are isolated then you probably have your sites on the brighter days being more consistent.
IF your days are more difficult, then you can often do something to alleviate the pattern.
Take a look at your daily patterns.
Most of us have a routine.
Can you incorporate some relaxation time into your day? Try some exercise, go for a walk, enjoy more wholesome foods for energy and wellbeing? Perhaps start meditating for relaxation? Talking with friends can help balance the stressful feelings in your life as well. Social connections, not just from the digital networks, are important for us all too.
If you perhaps use food to relax or medicate your stress, then consider replacing food with another form of relaxation. Get a friend to join you for your chosen activity. Paint, yoga, sing, dance, walk, whatever inspires you.
Remember that there are professionals that are experts at helping people to manage their lives better and gain more fulfilment from their days. For example, Personal trainers, for physical health, speaking to a Dietician instead of going on the latest Fad diet, Psychologists for good mental health, and so on.
Talk with your Doctor for a good person to see if you need to chat.
The main thing is that you START. Where you start is not that crucial. Once you make a decision to begin, the rest will start to fall into place as your momentum takes over. You will begin to see that areas of your life that were frustrating may no longer be that way.
Little steps at the beginning can lead to a longer journey. You can then look back on your progress. It is good to acknowledge your progress, and congratulate yourself on your results.
So, get up, grab a notebook, make a list of what you will start, and the time you will start, today. Then decide when you will do it again. Tomorrow? Weekly? What works best for you is right for you. Try it. See what feels best. But start.
There are organisations that can also assist you if you feel too overwhelmed with the tasks at hand. Do it for you.
Remember, “Do not put off till tomorrow that which you can do today”.
You are certain to feel a lot better too.
After all, it is all part of looking after yourself, and ultimately, that is why I call it, “Loving Me”.
© Lynda Kaplan